Meerah Blogs

It has happened.  Meerah has seen the famous Hannah Montana. 

In a movie theater, not in the driveway or at the market.  Meerah is not so famous yet as to actually meet the great Hannah, but I have seen her on the film with the Miley Cyrus.  Meerah is very excited. 

The nice lady asked if Meerah would like to come with her and her young daughter to see this amazing concert film.  Meerah said, “Of course,” because Meerah is very fond of musicals, especially Bollywood ones.  At first, Meerah was a little confused.  I thought there were two girls singing, but the nice lady’s daughter explained things.  She said that Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus were the same person.  What kind of foolishness is this?  Then Meerah remembered that she had seen a musical movie like this before.  It involved two lives also, except it had a rat and a pig, not two girls singing and dancing. 

The concert movie was very nice even though it was not a Bollywood one.  Meerah enjoyed the dancing and singing very much.  I am not so sure about the special glasses.  When you put them on it looks like things are flying out to hit you in the face or the eye.  I thought I was doing well dodging these things, but they just kept coming.  The nice lady grabbed Meerah and explained they were special effects that came with the glasses.  She told Meerah to stop screaming so loudly because the children around us were getting frightened.  Still, Meerah enjoyed the concert film very much.  Hannah Montana and the Miley Cyrus do a good job.  (I know the nice lady’s daughter said they were one person, but Meerah is not so sure.)

Now, something else has happened.  Meerah has visited the great Wal-mart.

It was a wonderful experience.  Meerah was planning to visit other American markets and then give shopping tips to Americans who do not know how to shop for food.  (I hear they “eat out” at restaurants all the time.  This is not good.)  But why should Meerah go anywhere else to shop?  The Wal-mart has everything.  There are fruits and vegetables, flour, rice, herbs, spices, and tasty frozen burritos that Meerah has just tried.

Then, in another part of the market, there are many other wonderful things.  Clothes, shoes, toys and games for children, even tires to put on your car if you need them.  Meerah even saw furniture and kitchen appliances.  It reminded me of the market at home, except there were no goats. 

There weren’t any sheep or chickens either.  Maybe Meerah will visit some other markets. 

Right now, I tell all the people who do not know how to shop for food to try the Wal-mart.  It has so many things that you should be able to find something to cook for yourself to eat.  If you do not have a stove or a firepit, the Wal-mart has microwaves to buy.  If you buy the microwave, try the frozen burritos.  Meerah found them delicious.     

Meerah has a problem. 

I followed the nice lady’s suggestion and put some of my book into this blog.  It was nice to see more of Meerah’s wisdom going out into the world-wide nest.  Perhaps there are people out there who do not know how to make firepits.  Those people would be a great nuisance to their neighbors.  It made Meerah very happy to think that she was helping these people and their neighbors.  I decided to help some more by sharing my wisdom about going to the market.  After all, those people who did not know about firepits until Meerah typed most likely have no idea of how to argue for the best vegetables or harangue the butcher for the best goat.  These people are probably annoying their neighbors, begging them for a share in their dinner or extending their visits until good manners require the unfortunate neighbors to extend the hospitality of a meal.  This is not good.  It makes Meerah very sad, and slightly angry. 

So Meerah is ready to type about shopping for food.  She has many tips ready for those unfortunate and irritating souls who did not know about firepits and do not know the right pitch and inflection for successful bargaining.  Then, the nice lady calls.  She read Meerah’s blog about cooking and firepits.  At first, she seems happy that Meerah has followed her suggestion.  Then, she asks what Meerah will be typing about next.  So I tell her. 

She does not think learning to judge the quality of goods in a market stall by comparing the length of chin hairs on the stall-holders is important.  She says this is not going to create the buzz we want.  I explain to her about the poor, ignorant and irritating people who do not know about firepits and bargaining.  I say that sharing my wisdom with them is important.  It will stop the buzzing of angry neighbors and relatives who are tired of taking care of these foolish ones.

I think the nice lady has a health problem.  Her breathing became very loud and heavy on the phone.  Then, there was silence.  I hung up because I was afraid she was dead and I did not want to be on the phone with a ghost.  When she called back, she scared me so much I dropped the phone. 

After a long while with much talking, the nice lady gave Meerah some more suggestions.  Meerah’s marketing wisdom for those who are irritating their neighbors will wait.  The nice lady explained that there are many people who do not know how to shop for food in America.  Meerah wondered how these people survived, and why there hadn’t been a revolt among the neighbors in America.  The nice lady explained some more.  She said neighbors do not feed each other in America, instead they eat out.  Meerah was appalled.  Eating out does not mean eating outside in the yard – it means eating from a restaurant.  This is not good.

So now, Meerah has a problem.  Do I help the ignorant who are irritating their neighbors, or do I help those who are so ignorant they are irritating me?  Pfffpt.  It is no problem.  I will help all the ignorant and irritating ones.  But first, I help those that are irritating me.  

Meerah is not as familiar with shopping in the market, American-style.  So I will visit some markets and share my wisdom after that.  When I tell the nice lady this plan, she says it is good and will help with the buzz.  I told her I am tired of hearing about the buzz, and I am typing about shopping in the market to stop the buzzing of angry neighbors and relatives. 

The nice lady’s breathing became very loud and heavy again on the phone, but she made sure to tell me she was not dead.  She also told me there is no world-wide nest.  It is a web.  Meerah thinks this is disgusting.  Spiders make webs.  The nice lady hung up after that. 

So here is Meerah again.  Typing some more.  This blogging is hard work.  Not the thinking of something to write.  That is no problem.  Meerah’s head is full of things to share, much like a pumpkin with all the seeds, or a large corn cob with all the kernels, or a large sack, full of rice.  Maybe I should stop now.  I am very hungry.

I am back now – not hungry anymore.  What was Meerah typing about?  Oh yes, how hard this blogging is.  I have many ideas, and the nice lady who helps me showed me how to type and set me up with this blog.  She said I must work hard, and I must share the blog with other people.  So I type, then I try to share.  This does not work out the way the nice lady said it would.   

Today this nice lady told me that I sent out invitations to people to start their own blogs instead of telling them to come read mine.  What foolishness is this?  Meerah is frustrated and slightly angry about this.  How will we get the buzz if people do not read Meerah’s blog?  Maybe we need a goat.

OK.  The nice lady explained some more about the invitations.  Meerah used the wrong buttons on the screen.  I sent out e-mails to the people I invited with a line they can use to read Meerah’s blog, and I told them to stop typing their own blogs because they do not have enough wisdome to share.  The nice lady was not sure about that line, but I know. 

She also says we definitely do not need a goat.  I say, we’ll see. 

Finally, Meerah blogs.  I’m not sure what I am doing, but I am doing it. 

What is this thing – a blog?  And why is Meerah using it?  Good questions.  I do this because my publisher says to.  That’s write, I mean, right.  The nice lady who was so helpful with my calendar now says I need more “exposure” before the publisher will print my book.  I tell the nice lady that I wear the heavy coat and mittens to avoid the “exposure.”  

She laughed, then said I needed to ”generate a buzz with a blog.”  What?  That sounds terrible – like something that could happen if you bought an old goat at the market.  She explained some more, told me it was typing.  Meerah can do that. 

 So here I am, typing in a blog.  (This word, blog, still bothers me.)  Could someone quickly start buzzing so the nice lady will print my book? 

OK, I am done now.