Meerah Blogs

Meerah is very cold.  Meerah has been cold for many, many days now.  The nice lady says to just turn the heat up on the thermostat.  What foolishness is this?  The people with only letters for a name charge you much money each month to provide heat for your house.  I say, put on another sweater.  Right now, I’m wearing nine.

But it is still cold.  Maybe I will put on my mittens too.  That is mux brtt5x////

OK, the mittens did not work out so well for typing.  The nice lady brought over a space heater so it is now nice and toasty over by Meerah’s computer.  That was a very nice thing for the nice lady to do.  I told her not to bother.  I was going to build a fire in my living room.  She got very excited then and said, “No, don’t do that.  I’ll be right over!”  I don’t think the cold is very good for her health problems.  When she got to my house she was breathing very heavily again and her eyes were big and darting all around.  

Once her breathing slowed down and her eyes rolled back into one place, she explained to Meerah that I could not build a fire in my living room because I do not have a fireplace.  This sounded like foolishness to Meerah.  I have much experience with building fires in places they are not originally meant to be.  But, Meerah is full of kindness and concern, especially when it comes to people who are not in the best of health.  So I promised the nice lady I would not build any fires in my living room, and I would use the space heater she brought me VERY CAREFULLY.  Meerah typed those last words larger to show how loudly the nice lady spoke them.  Maybe the cold has affected her ears also?

So, now I am nice and warm.  Meerah will share with you her wisdom for cold weather.

1.  Don’t keep turning up the thermostat when it gets colder inside your house.  This just means the people with only letters for a name can charge you more money.

2.  People who charge much money to heat other people’s houses only use letters for a name so angry people cannot find them in very cold weather. 

3.  Wearing nine sweaters will keep you warm, but make it very difficult to make any sudden movements.  Plan ahead.

4.  Ten sweaters is too much. 

5.  If you need to wear your mittens inside, do not try to type.

6.  Apparently, it is not acceptable to build a fire inside your house unless you have a designated “fireplace.”  (Meerah is researching how to build one of these right now.)

7.  Space heaters are great for keeping small areas of your house warm and cozy.  But they must be used VERY CAREFULLY.  ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME, MEERAH?  VERY, VERY CAREFULLY!  Sorry, the nice lady’s voice is still ringing in Meerah’s ears.  Maybe I should turn down the space heater.

That is all Meerah’s wisdom for the cold weather right now.

Pppffpt!  This is a very bad day.  A very, very bad day.  I will say it again – Pppfffpppt!

OK.  Now Meerah feels a little better.  I will tell you about my day.

First, Meerah and the nice lady are working again on Meerah’s book.  There is much I could say about this, but I have typed it all before.  So all I will say now is that the nice lady’s brain is very disturbed.  If she reads this and calls me on the telephone with her angry voice, I will not answer.  Also, Meerah has set her answering machine message to this:  “If you wish to speak to Meerah, perhaps to learn some of her vast store of wisdom, please leave a message.  Do not let the beep frighten you.  Speak after it.  If you are the nice lady then, Pppfffppt!” 

Second, Meerah has lost her goat puppets.  This is very sad.  They were nice puppets too.  Meerah found scraps that could be eyes and ears, as well as some nice little twigs that could be shaped into horns.  I glued all this very carefully onto a nice pair of socks I found in my neighbor’s trash.  Meerah was very surprised to find these socks because this neighbor doesn’t usually throw out usable items.  When the puppets were finished I took them to the neighbor’s house and thanked them for throwing out such a nice pair of socks.  (They were very long and white with two small bands of color at the top, right where the collar would be for the goat.  You can now understand Meerah’s excitement.)  The wife seemed too busy to listen to Meerah’s happy story of finding the socks, but the husband listened with great attention.  He even asked to borrow the puppets.  He wanted to show his children.  This made Meerah very happy. 

But now, I am sad.  My neighbor says he left the puppets in Meera’s mailbox the next morning, but Meerah cannot find them.  I have searched the whole neighborhood, but have not found my puppets.  When I asked the man if he could have forgotten or put the puppets somewhere else, he sai, “No.”  I am afraid I will not see my goat puppets ever again. 

Finally, a third bad thing happened today.  Meerah has a nice friend who told Meerah about a funny movie she thought Meerah would like.  It was on the TV one night, but Meerah was going to be busy.  So the friend told Meerah to record the movie.  I told my friend this would not work.  One day Meerah pushed some buttons on the nice lady’s DVD player and smoke came out.  Now the nice lady’s DVD player is a plant stand at Meerah’s house.  So, Meerah’s friend is very nice and offered to record the movie for Meerah.  This made me very happy. 

My friend gave me the DVD last night and I was very excited to watch the movie today.  I put the disc into my DVD player (not one that is a plant stand) and pushed play.  Sadly, my friend did not record the funny movie.  Instead, what Meerah saw was sweaty men in a ring hitting each other.  It was not really that funny.  I called my friend and she said, “Oh no!  I must have recorded Ultimate Fighting Champion by mistake.”  I told her it was all right.  I will try to find the movie in the library – or maybe at Walmart.

So, that is my very bad day.  I have been angry, sad, and disappointed.   And I still am a little bit.  If you have a very bad day like Meerah, try saying, “Pppfffppt!”  It helps a little.  Not much, but a little bit. 

If you see my goat puppets, please let me know.

So, here I am.  Typing in this blog the wisdom I learned in 2008.  There is much to share, so stop typing your own blogs or checking your book of faces and listen to Meerah.  This is important!

1. It is OK to go through your neighbor’s trash if you call it “recycling.” 
2. It is not OK to serve your neighbors food that has been pulled out of the trash.  (Of course, if you do not tell them where it comes from then . . . maybe?  Probably no.  This has not ever worked for Meerah because her neighbors ask too many questions.  You try it and let Meerah know how it works for you.)
3. Make sure your mittens are fastened securely when checking trash during winter.
4. It is hard to find a goat around here.
5. It is OK to pet the goats at the zoo.
6. It is not OK to take a goat out of the zoo.  (Even if you offer them a good price, the zoo people still will not sell.  Meerah does not undersand such foolishness.)
7. Zookeepers do not haggle well, so they call the people with the carts and loud radios to drive you out of the zoo.
8. If the people with the carts and radios drive you out of the zoo, you cannot get back in.
9. Even if you try climbing over the gate.  (Ppffpt!)
10. Even if the nice lady talks to them.   (Pppffffpt!)
11. Many months later the zoo will send you a letter saying you may come back to visit in 2010.  (Meerah will find her own goat by then.  Silly zoo people.)
12. There are many things you cannot say at swimming lessons. 
13. Walmart has good frozen burritos.
14. Silver Dollar City is a wonderful place.
15. The Silver Dollar City people mean it when they say a ride will make you wet.  (My poncho is now a lovely wearable afghan.)
16. There is a spider who lives in the world-wide-web and eats Meerah’s e-mails.
17. The spider never eats the nice lady’s e-mails, so they must be friends.
18. Sometimes the nice lady’s brain is disturbed.  (But Meerah tries not to mention this too often because it makes the nice lady very upset and that isn’t good for her brain.)
19. The nice lady’s children seem to have normal, undisturbed brains.  This is good, but we don’t talk about it much either because for some reason, this upsets the nice lady too.  Oh well.
20. I hope the nice lady doesn’t read this list.

That is all.  Meerah wishes you all a wonderful new year.

Good news!  I thought this post was eaten by the spider in the world-wide web, but it was not.  I have found it.  Enjoy.  Next Meerah will write about what she has learned in 2008.

So I am back.  Even though Meerah has been on a break from her book, I have still been very busy.  First, Meerah has a busy recycling schedule.  Many people have asked Meerah to come and go through their trash before it is picked up by the big trucks.  At first, Meerah tried to help everyone who asked, but that . . . Ppffpt.  It was too much.  Meerah has many other things she wishes to do.  So now, I check my neighborhood only and a few special houses.  If others ask, I tell them, “No.  I cannot.”  But, I share with them many ideas for the things they throw out, so maybe they won’t have so much trash always.

Next, Meerah has enjoyed visiting garage sales.  Here I have found many useful items.  Also, I have the chance to practice my haggling skills.  It is not much practice, because the people in the garages are too nice.  A young child in my village would do much better than they, but it is all right.  They have not been taught well, and sadly, Meerah is too busy to train them. 

Meerah has also discovered something called Farmers’ Markets.  These are wonderful places where people sell fruits, vegetables, and many other things outside.  I have visited a few of these, and they remind me of home.  But still I have not yet found my goat.  Meerah would be very sad about this if the nice lady had not distracted me. 

This distraction was a very good thing because Meerah also would be sad about missing the celebration day for the swimming lessons.  It seems that the nice lady tried to call Meerah, but Meerah’s answering machine would not take her message.  Then, the nice lady’s daughter said, “But Mom, the parents at the pool said that she couldn’t . . . “  The nice lady spoke quickly then to invite Meerah to go with her and her children to a wonderful place called Silver Dollar City.  This seemed good to Meerah, even though I was still confused about what the nice lady’s daughter was trying to say.  I also made sure to call my house three times from the nice lady’s place.  When I got home, I had three messages that said this:  “I am checking this machine.  If it does not work, it becomes a plant stand.”  The machine must not want to sit under plants.  Or maybe it is afraid of the nice lady. 

But Meerah does not have time to ponder this mystery because she is going to Silver Dollar City.  The nice lady tells me what to bring and I am waiting for her on my front step two mornings later.  She looks at Meerah strangely and asks if I will be comfortable in the clothes I have chosen.  Knowing that her brain is sometimes disturbed, I tell her, “Yes,” I will be fine in these clothes.  And we go.

We drive for a long time in the nice lady’s car, but that is all right.  Meerah and the nice lady’s children play counting games and letter games.  Sadly, Meerah is not very successful with the letter games.  English is not my first language.  But the children tell me I did very well, and they agreed that “g’s” and “q’s” can be very confusing when passed at high speeds.  Is is so nice to see that the nice lady’s brain problems have not been passed on to her children.  The nice lady did not seem to appreciate this good news, and we spent the rest of the drive listening to music. 

When we arrived at Silver Dollar City, Meerah was amazed.  It is a wonderful place!  It is like a village market on festival days.  There were shops with skilled craftsmen and women, lots of food and music.  There was even a small place for animals – with goats.  But only to pet;  not to buy,  steal or eat.  Meerah knows that now after the trip to the zoo. 

There were even rocks that made music.  That was amazing, and a little scary for Meerah.  I screamed and spit on the nice lady and her children to protect them from the singing rocks.  The nice lady told me the rocks weren’t really singing.  The rocks are attached to speakers.  This was still amazing to me, but I stopped spitting.  It was hot, and I was getting a little dehydrated. 

We walked up and down hills.  Rode many rides that made our stomachs jump up and down, and saw some shows.  It was a nice day; on the way to our hotel, I thanked the nice lady for inviting me.  She seemed pleased until I said that her brain must be getting better.  We listened to music all the way to the hotel.

The next morning we went back to the wonderful Silver Dollar City.  The nice lady said that on this day we would ride the water rides.  Even though I did not know what that meant, I was so excited that I could not sleep.  Meerah was up and ready to go by 5:00 a.m.  The nice lady and her children took a little longer to get ready, but we were still at the park by 9:01 a.m.  Of course, I had to help them by clapping and shouting loudly, “Get up!  Don’t sleep!  The water may be gone when we get there!”  Also, I banged my shoe on the nice lady’s headboard just a little.  

The children started speaking to me again once we got into the park.  The nice lady spoke to me again after our third ride.  I was beginning to worry about her brain again, but I did not say anything.  That ride seemed to have scared her.  She was sitting behind me and had her arms wrapped around my neck.  She did a lot of screaming on that ride.  I tried to, but all that came out was, “Urck!  Graaack!   Ppffppt!” 

After that, all was well.  We rode more rides, visited more shops, and saw the animals again.  Meerah enjoyed it all and learned many, many news things.  First, a ride called “Waterboggan” and wool do not mix.  My poncho will never be the same.  Second, it is not “acceptable” to curse the magician during his show.  I thought it was “interactive”, but the nice lady said, “No.”  Third, the nice lady may suffer periods of intense brain disturbance, but inbetween she can do many kind things.  Also, her children show many signs of not suffering from her health issues.  Fourth, Meerah enjoyed Silver Dollar City very much.  I’ve already found several other uses for my waterlogged poncho.